- skills
- interests
- associations
- work experience
- volunteer experience, etc.
- Standard college/work BS we all include (emphases, honors, etc.)
7.14.2009
The Alternative Resume Series
Like many resumes, mine reads as excitingly as a Congressional Bill, and looks just as tired.
In my vain attempts to find work in this woeful awful icky economy, I have realized that I stand in an interesting, yet frustrating situation:
I am somewhat overqualified for many jobs and sickeningly under-qualified for the rest.
The only solution I can think of? Grab the nearest piece of corrugated cardboard, sweep up a sharpie with which to write "Will File Motions for Food at Swanky Restaurants," and stand at the corner of State and South Temple during the daytime hours.
Or...in the alternative, I suppose I could make my resume accurately reflect what the jobs require, not necessarily who and what I am.
With that in mind, I'm going to publish a series of alternative resumes that should go along with a slew of careers that I either find myself over- or under-qualified for.
As any newly minted bachelor degree holder can tell you, resumes should have an objective at the top. Here's my objective: through this series, I hope to be able to discover for myself how exactly I can remedy that situation and give myself a shot at the glamour, the prestige, the money, and, in the end, the job.
Really, though?
Yeah, I would still like a job. But if you happen to laugh along the way, AWESOME.
So, here's how it's gonna work:
(1) I will attempt to stick with what I actually HAVE in my resume repertoire. Including:
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7 comments:
Singing waiter? Perhaps on a cruise ship...
Brine shrimp fisherman on the Great Salt Lake.
Please be sure to add "Twilight basher" as a skill. I mean you have the #1 hit for "Stephanie Meyers sucks" still! And like 400 gazillion comments on it. Thats pretty big. Could that somehow be turned into a job? Make it happen.
I think you should do what thirty thousand other recently graduated, newly unemployed law graduates think about doing: work for free! It feels just like having a job: the stress, the boredom, and the frustration all without the added burden of figuring out how a spend a pay check!
dear brother,
remember how your sister works for career services and makes part of her living helping people make ther resumes fit their jobs? maybe we should talk ;)
I would love to see your qualifications to be a "Mommy Blogger"
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