Eric Boyd Vogeler
123 Mysteria Lane
Salt Lake City, UT 84111
(801) 555-7445
thesingingwaiter@hotmail.com
Objective Sing my heart out, serve delicious food and bring joy and happiness to the World
Education
Master of Entertainment, December 1982 to present
The School of Hard Knocks, The Universe I live in
Juris Doctor, J. Reuben Clark School of Law, April 2009
Brigham Young University, Provo, Utah
Thesis: “The Hilarity of Law; or Why Lawyers Commit Suicide”
MC: “The Opening Social” August, 2007
“The Halloween Social” October, 2008
“The Awards Banquet March, 2009
Singer: “The Italian Birthday Singer” December, 2006
“The Phantom Skit” March, 2007
“The Pained Face Guy” March, 2009
“The Talent Show Guitar Guy” March, 2007 & 2008
Bachelor of Useless, Yet Interesting, Information, May 2006
University of Utah, Salt Lake City, Utah
Fluent in Spanish, Portuguese, Witty Banter, Food Ordering,
Mixylodian and Diatonic Scales
Experience
Musicals
Performed as Tommy Albright in East High School’s production of Brigadoon, November, 2001 to rave reviews from at least three, non-familial, non-obligatorily attending audience members
Delighted audiences by splitting pants and acting hysterical as “The Mayor” in Clayton Middle School’s production of Bye, Bye, Birdie!, November 1996
Restauranting
Extensive experience ordering, sampling, and recommending food to those who really don’t care what I think, and probably aren’t listening to me anyway
Singing
Sang, warbled, and delighted my way through choir training at the instruction of Dr. John Cooksey, University of Utah, 2001-2005
Awards and Interest
#1 First-Born Son, awarded continually by Marcia Vogeler, Dec. 15, 1982 to present
Most...Interesting...Stage Kiss, Brigadoon, East High School 2000
Best Non-Singing Waiter Birthday Song Singer, Geneva’s Birthday Party
Participants (simple majority vote), Macaroni Grill, December 2006
Favorite Law Student Voice (Male) Class of 2009, as presented by Marie Davies
3 comments:
I would hire you. Though I would like to know your definition of "...Interesting..." I need to know how I did.
Did you give up looking for a legal job and change your profession? Ha ha. This was too funny. I especially love the award for firstborn son and degree in totally useless information.
It's really a shame that you're busy studying for the bar because I could use more of these Alternate Job Resumes to read while i'm bored at work. Hilarious, really.
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